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2005 Predictions

I'll come back and check up on these at the end of the year:

  • President Bush dies following a bomb attack.
  • Civil war erupts in both the US and in Iraq.
  • The Army of California takes the west coast and invades Mexico.
  • The Internet fractures into dozens of disconnected walled networks run by corporations.
  • Russia and China are admitted into the European Union.
  • Mt. St. Helens erupts, devestating southern Washington state and Oregon and darkening skies worldwide for a matter of weeks.
  • Hail the size of Airstream trailers pummels the midwest in a freak storm.
  • I am abducted and sexually tortured by a team of elite models/sexual torturers from beyond our galaxy.
  • Armies of zombies are awakened due to a secret military project and roam the earth eating the brains of the living.
  • The Earth splits open, revealing a new species of crystaline creatures who devour everything in their paths and poop diamonds.
  • Evangelicals mysteriously start floating toward Heaven
  • Martha Stewart is released from prison.

January 3, 2005 in Now you've done it... | Permalink


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I was with you until the zombies--I mean that's just ridiculous.

Posted by: mark | Jan 3, 2005 8:46:43 PM

I wonder if poop diamonds follow the four C's. And if color is mentionable. I suppose J.Lo could wear one and it would become fashionable.

And I heard M.Stew lost a prison decorating contest, so if her temper is really as bad as I've heard, she might be designing a shiv w/ french milled blood grooves as we speak. Which would suggest that she wouldn't get out this year.

Posted by: JKF | Jan 4, 2005 3:14:55 PM

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